These are my 10 most popular reasons why women and men seek treatment with me. This list is by no means exhaustive, but just a sampling of issues that motivate people to seek help.

10 Most Common Sexual Concerns in Women

  1. Low libido/No libido/Change in libido
  2. Incompatible sexual desire with partner (this can be a “deal-breaker” if not negotiated properly)
  3. Can’t achieve orgasm (at all, under any circumstance, including masturbation)
  4. Can’t achieve orgasm (from intercourse – this typically bothers the guys more than the gals…it’s an ego thing)
  5. Pelvic pain (painful sex)
  6. Can’t get aroused (lack of response to sexual stimulation)
  7. Can’t move past an affair (stuck in relational trauma)
  8. Considering having an affair; or guilt over your own affair
  9. Flirting too much and know it’s a problem
  10. Disturbing sexual fantasies/interests/behaviors (i.e. rape fantasies, sex with strangers)

10 Most Common Sexual Concerns in Men

  1. Erection problems (can’t achieve erection and/or can’t maintain erection)
  2. Climax too fast (rapid ejaculation, formerly premature ejaculation)
  3. Can’t ejaculate with my partner (or inside my partner)
  4. Porn addiction/Sex addiction
  5. Compulsive masturbation (sometimes up to 12 times per day)
  6. Secret homoeroticism/Secret homosexual encounters
  7. Illegal sexual behaviors (prostitution, child porn, voyeurism, exhibitionism)
  8. Can’t get past an affair or considering having an affair
  9. Alternative sexual interests (Fetishism, BDSM)
  10. Don’t find my partner sexually attractive (i.e. gained weight, “let herself go”)

Other Common Sexual Concerns

  1. Gender conflict/Transgender issues
  2. Sexual dysfunction due to chronic illness
  3. Sexual dysfunction due to medication
  4. Sexual dysfunction due to surgery or chemo
  5. Sexual dysfunction due to physical disability
  6. Sexual dysfunction due to mental illness
  7. Sexual dysfunction due to infertility and/or pregnancy loss
  8. Sexual dysfunction/conflict due to religious beliefs

I have devoted my entire professional life to honoring the meaning of sexuality and the role it plays in people’s lives. As soon as someone steps foot in my office (or cyber office), I send a clear message that sexuality is a fundamental component of overall well-being. I convey my unshakeable belief that talking about sex in a therapeutic setting can be profoundly liberating and life-changing.

There’s no better time than now to achieve your optimal sexual health!


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